Friday, June 18, 2010

Mr. Moms and Chubby Chasers


Its been a while since I've the time to blog, oh loyal readers, and I apologize. There are many reasons why I haven't been blogging lately ranging from my new job to puke. With father's day around the corner, however, I wanted to use my soapbox to give a virtual hug to the father's out there who make motherhood, and especially working motherhood, possible.

I often hear guys at work, mostly older guys in there late 40s and early 50s, talking about how they have to leave work a little early to be "Mr. Mom" or to "babysit" the kids. Usually when I hear these idiots talking it takes all of my strength to keep myself from slapping the Mr. Mom and informing him of this crazy new thing I heard about called being a dad. (I know this post is not sounding particularly virtual hug like, yet, but the hug is coming, I swear...). An article I read this week in Slate magazine talks about how those Mr. Mom types are being replaced by dads who brag about loving their kids and actually even exaggerate their reports of the amount of time they spend with their kids.

On top of that good news, a NY Times article last week talks about some of the biological and behavioral changes that dads throughout the animal kingdom go through. These animals are great examples of the biological basis and necessity for good daddies. For example, when a female marmoset or tamarin gets pregnant the dendritic connections in the male's brain change, he puts on weight, and his hormones change. This is all in preparation to help with the childcare. Once the babies are born, the male carries the babies the majority of the time, just bringing them (they normally have twins) to the female for feedings. This allows the marmosets and tamarins to take care of other things, which in their case means getting pregnant again and looking for food.

One of my favorite animals in this article, though, was the gulf pipefish who appears to be a bit of a chubby chaser. The bigger the female, the better he will take care of their eggs. Man, it would be so awesome if I could sit around all day eating Brownie Bites with the excuse that I was trying to get fat to improve my husband's child care abilities.

Well, despite the fact that I don't have an excuse to sit around and eat Brownie Bites my husband is an incredible daddy. He changes diapers, dresses, feeds, bathes, entertains, cuddles, goes to pediatrician appointments and gets puked on without any question about whether or not that should be his role. I often look at our family and am amazed at the equality of our marriage and our roles as parents. So, thank you my love! And yay for daddies everywhere who are fathers and not Mr. Moms; who spend time with their kids instead of babysit; and who still love their wives even when they gain a few pounds.

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